Working Out

So, it’s going to be two weeks now since I’ve been going to the gym. I’m going to try to stick with it, but I’ve made it a part of my daily routine. In other words, just like I how I eat dinner everyday, I go to the gym everyday. I’m going at my own pace, in terms of not getting all nuts. After the 4th or 5th day, I felt a difference in myself, not physical, but mentally. I felt a bit calmer and not as anxious.

I think going to the gym or at least doing some type of physical activity (besides walking to your car, or commuting home) should be a part of our day. I can see how people get really obsessed going to the gym because you are dealing with yourself and listening to your favorite music. Nothing else matters, but you and the great music.

Do I see a change? NOPE…lol. I really don’t see a change in my body but I do see a change in my attitude and state of mind.

I do the following at the gym: 

  • 30 minutes on the treadmill 
    • 5 minutes warmup
    • 10 minutes incline and power walk
    • 15 minutes incline and jogging
  • 10 minutes on the Arc Trainer machine 
  • 10 minutes on elipitical 
  • 15 minutes of weights 

So, bottom line, go out and do some exercise. Go out and enjoy some great music.


Patience and Exercise

I know I wrote a blog about faith/meditation yesterday, but like I said I’m not perfect. Last night, I swear my patience was wearing very thin. I felt this fire inside of me, like a ticking time bomb about to explode any minute with emotions. I just want to be alone. Is this normal?? There are times when I do not want to talk to my boyfriend on the phone, I do not want to deal with my parents, and lastly there is fucking way I want deal or see my brother. He is the icing on the cake. I can’t stand him, especially when I’m losing my patience. He is one of the reasons why my parents and I are constantly stressed out, and now I’m going to go on a rant about him (sorry!). Maybe it makes me feel better, but what the hell. Here I go. He is a PIG!!! and expects my parents and I to cater to his every fucking need. He is one of the most selfish persons I know on this earth. He is way much older than I am and yet he acts like a 19 year old immature brat. He still lives with his parents and is in total debt (credit cards, school loans- mind you he graduated like 10-15 years ago), took out loans on behalf of my mom (which by the way ended up destroying her credit scores- because he did not pay his student loans in the past 10 years), and he has tons of credit cards (did I tell you that some of the credit cards were under my parents names???). Every time he comes home, I swear, I feel like he brings a dark cloud with him. I love my brother and I always will, but he just adds that extra volume of stress in my life.

***I wrote the above paragraph last night***

So, since last night, I cooled off, I think I was very tired because I came home late (last minute meeting at work) and the night before. Also, I noticed that when I do not work out, I feel like total shit. I’ve started going to a recreation with my dad, it has an indoor and outdoor pool and a fitness center. My dad goes there almost everyday and has been getting my mom and I to go with him. I use to HATE going, only because I was extremely lazy and just wanted to watch tv and relax after work. Who can blame me? My commute to work is about an hour long. Anyways, in the past month, I’ve been going with my father and I head straight to the fitness center while my dad goes to the pool. Oh did I mention, the recreation has 2 saunas?? No wonder, my dad loves going there. It’s a good way to relax. I go to the gym for about 40-60 mins and then I go to the saunas. I just sit there and try to do some meditation (I do not mean sitting with my legs crossed and saying ‘cmmmmmmm’)- I just lay there and do some breathing exercises (breathe in and breathe out). All jokes aside, adding the gym/sauna in my daily routine, Monday through Friday routine, does wonders. Believe me, I can lose some weight, but I do this for mental exercise (I’m not crazy, well, I don’t think I am, but going through all this bullshit drives me insane). Also, I use to get extremely bored, especially when using the treadmill, but I load up my kindle with some books (I love mystery books) and read it while I’m on either the treadmill or elliptical. My boyfriend thinks I’m nuts when I do this (reading my kindle) but I just speed walk on the treadmill and have it on an incline. For me, reading helps to kill time.

Bottom line- I highly recommend adding some exercise to your daily routine, especially when writing a dissertation and have a 9:00-5:00PM job.  I honestly, go on the treadmill for about 30-40 minutes and then the elliptical for about 10-15 minutes. Try it! I started off with baby steps and then it (exercising)  just gradually became part of my routine.

Day 8_MIA…Sorry


Sorry for MAJOR DELAY! I think my last blog was in October! whoops! Let me catch you up, the reason I am doing this is because I cannot sleep. All I keep doing is thinking ALOT!!!

So, I think in my last blog- I was doing doing a daily routine which included: waking up early, go to the gym, then do work, go home, do some more work (because you know YOU ALWAYS TAKE WORK HOME WITH YOU AS A GRADUATE STUDENT…AND IF YOU DON’T CONSIDER YOURSELF AWESOME!), then have dinner, watch tv, and pass out!

Well, the routine worked for a while, when a curveball came my way. I mentioned this in my first blog, about my family problems. Well, it only intensified and got worse since I last brought it up. Long story short, my dad was about to be unemployed, he is a superintendent (basically cleaning and managing a building), and just Yesterday, the building was officially sold by another company. Good news is, that my dad is working for that company now. However, the weeks leading up to yesterday, were the worse days, not only for me, but for my parents and brother as well. Why? well, because if my dad did not work then we’d have to find a place to live and to be honest, we do not have the ability to purchase a home or even cover 3 months worth of rent (security deposit, real estate agent fees, and 1st months rent). The whole ordeal was STRESSFUL and it really screwed up things, because my mom was depressed, my dad tried to be positive and telling us that ‘everything will be OK’, my brother was trying really hard to straighten things out with my dad previous employers (basically they are trying to screw my dad over). I dreaded calling my parents (I call them everyday and at least 2x’s a day) because of the problems and issues going on at home. Nothing was the same anymore because we were all so overwhelm. I did not want to deal with it because I have to finish my dissertation. All I kept thinking about was my family and it is really difficult to separate family and work, well for me at least.

However, since my dad is now working for these new company, we are able to stay in the same building and he will now have benefits, over-time pay, rent free apartment, and lastly he will only work certain hours of the day (this is totally the opposite from his previous employers). My mom is going to work today, which she is super happy about. So, in a way I am happy and relieved because this whole situation had a negative effect on me, emotionally, mentally, and physically.

Some updates with my dissertation, well I am almost there! I just have the analysis/findings and conclusion chapter to work on and that is it. I was planning on graduating this semester BUT I do not think it is possible. Also, I thought that if I graduate in the spring of 2015, I can use my grace-period (6 months) to pay back my loans. So, if I graduate in December then I would have to start paying back my loans in May; however, if I graduate in May I will pay them back in November. Also, good news! I have a full-time job waiting for me in February!! can you believe??! I super happy and relieved!

Anyways, I’m starting to feel sleepy (it’s like 12:50 AM)- I will try to go the gym today and start my routine!

I will try to start writing again here, I promise!!!